dressing-down ("dre-si[ng]-’daun) – n. a sound scolding

Do members of Life B-P Church need a dressing-down on their dressing? "Surely not!" the hopeful would say, "we are after all a fundamentalist church, where people, having been taught the Word, would be careful to apply, right?" But enters the realist, who retorts, "If that’s the case, why is there evidence to the contrary?" I have received no less than 5 correspondences over the past few months from godly and mature Christians with regard to this issue. And they typically read like this – "Mark, I notice the fashion of the world creeping into Church through the dressing of our young people. Many of our young people are showing off their midriff and wearing low cut pants/jeans that reveal much flesh when they sit. There are also other dressing inappropriate for worship/Church. Can we do something about this? If we don’t nip it at the bud, it would be very hard to do it later. Worse still, those not wearing such clothes would be much pressurized."

Is this a correct observation? Well, this observation is correct to at least 5 people. And why is it that, when separation unto holiness and modesty has been taught, some Lifers continue to be less cautious in areas such as this? Is it a matter of ignorance, indifference, or insurgence? Indeed, it could be any of the three. There is a concern because it is the quest of every believer to grow into Christ-likeness – to have temperance and control over their body, to have a sound mind, and to be wise in all spiritual things – in other words, to be transformed from and not conformed to this world. And when godly and mature Christians are saying something about this issue, we should listen.

However, it is not only what they say that is important, it is the teaching of Scripture that is the rule of our faith and practice. These two things go hand in hand – instruction and admonition. A Christian doesn’t grow by imbibing more Biblical facts alone, but he grows with the practice of his faith, in obedience to Scripture, being kept in check by the admonition of Christian brethren. So in order to understand this issue, it is important to know what Scripture says.

But what does Scripture have to say about dressing that can be relevant to this day and time? After all, fashion changes and culture also changes. For example, where people in the past would wear linen and wool, we wear cotton and nylon; and instead of T-shirts and sneakers, they wore tunics and thong sandals. So how can the Bible provide reasonable guidelines that are relevant to us today while still letting us remain current with our dressing?

While it can be tough to make clear cut decisions, these guidelines are tools in living out our Christian testimonies. This is important. We are after all to stand out as light in the world and to be different. And should this also reflect in our dressing? Sure, if the dressing of the world is contrary to these biblical guidelines, then we need to reconsider the ways we dress, if we are dressing like the world. And when the word "world" is mentioned, it doesn’t refer to every single person in the world, for we would have to then dress differently from everyone else and have a distinctive Bible-Presbyterian garb. The word "world" here refers to the evil and the wickedness of the world, as in 1 John 2:16, "For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world." Hence, the Christian must be different from those influenced by the wickedness of the world – he must grow in sanctification.

Now, this subject might not have been as necessary 150 years ago – because the world, although wicked, was restrained in many aspects. But that is not how it is today. The world is increasingly worsening – you don’t have to be religious to observe that – crime is increasing and so is immorality. And the Bible tells us to separate from the wickedness of this world unto holiness.

But just how wicked is the world getting? Whatever is happening in Singapore is part of the trend elsewhere. And it is the face of sensuality in Singapore that is rapidly changing. A 1994 NUH study conducted on the sexual habits of final year students in NUS showed that one in three non-medical students who stayed in the hostels were sexually active. Six out of ten of these had casual sex for the first time at the age of 18. Interestingly, only one out of seven medical students admitted to having sex before marriage. Religious beliefs and a higher view of marriage were some of the reasons for abstinence among medical students. The statistics among the general populace is more alarming however. In a 1996 survey on sexual perceptions, only a slim majority of 51% of adolescents surveyed said that pre-marital sex was wrong. 41% looked upon sex before marriage as acceptable if mutual love exists and marriage is the ultimate goal. 9% felt that pre-marital sex with no strings attached is not a problem. Thought is transmitted into action faster than people think.

A significant study was done in 1999 by the Singapore Planned Parenthood Association. The bulk of the respondents were in their middle teens. On their first dates, 18% had kissed on the lips, 10% had kissed past the lips, 5% indulged in petting and 3% had sex. These statistics changed once they were steady. 43% kissed, 25% deep kissed, 14% petted, and 7% had sex. When asked why they had sex, 37% replied that they were curious. When asked how they first knew about sex, some of them indicated that it was through television. These statistics do not stand alone. About 10% of all annual abortions were carried out on the fetuses of adolescent girls. MOH estimates that about 300-400 Singaporean adolescents contract at least 1 sexually transmitted disease annually. These statistics are now dated, and probably more shocking today.

And these trends in Singapore certainly affect the way people behave and act. Anyone would be naïve to deny that sensuality is more apparent today than before. And these worldwide trends have obviously affected clothing. Clothes and accessories have followed these trends. The human drive to preen is strong – that is why cosmetics, fashionable clothes, and perfumes exist. But if one is to inspect the very nature of many products today, the majority of them are intended to be overtly sensual. No longer is it just lipstick – but lip gloss, lip wax, and lip liner – all to make the lips appear fuller for the kissing. Clothes, meant to cover, are today, meant to reveal. Spaghetti straps are now a common sight in church along with body-hugging outfits. Men are as culpable, if not responsible. Somewhere in the last 10 years, pumping iron gave rise to smaller shirts, which cost more!

This is the condition of the world. And the Christian is told to separate from such wickedness. Leviticus 11:45 tells us, "For I am the LORD that bringeth you up out of the land of Egypt, to be your God: ye shall therefore be holy, for I am holy." The word "holy" means consecrated or set apart, that is, separate. The Lord is separate and set apart from all ungodliness and all appearances of wickedness. And because He has redeemed the Christian from spiritual Egypt – from sin and the bondage thereof – the command is for the Christian to be separate and set apart from all ungodliness and all appearances of wickedness. If indeed some of the fashion trends in which people are dressing today have been heavily influenced and driven by this sensuality, then the Christian really has no business being seen in them, or entertaining thoughts of wearing them.

Before the Israelites entered the Promised Land, they were given a host of instructions on how they should conduct themselves, dress, and go about their occupations – instructions ranging from the mundane to the religious were given. Leviticus 19:28 tells us that "Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print any marks upon you: I am the LORD." The people were to be separate from the pagans and gentiles who tattooed themselves. Leviticus 21:5 says, "They shall not make baldness upon their head, neither shall they shave off the corner of their beard, nor make any cuttings in their flesh." The people of the Promised Land wore their hair in all sorts of ways, their priests particularly shaved the sides of their heads and the back, and hence the Israelites were forbidden to appear in that manner in order to remain distinct. And without this distinctiveness, their witness would be lost. How can a Christian lady minister to an unbeliever, explaining the importance of purity and chastity, when her midriff is spilling out from her pants and her bosom is tightly hugged by her tube top? It is an incongruous thing.

Hence, separation from wickedness and appearances of wickedness is an important guideline and principle, especially in the arena of dressing. But another guideline is just as important, and more specifically related to dressing – modesty.

What is modesty? Modesty is "being restrained by a sense of propriety; not forward, unpretending, free from anything suggestive of sexual impurity; moderate; not excessive, extreme, or extravagant." 1 Timothy 2:9-10 tells us, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; but (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works." Here we are told that the Christian has an obligation to dress in a manner that is consistent with his status as God’s child. We see in Isaiah 3:16 how the prophet made fun of and even opposed the immodesty of the women – "Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet..."

In 1 Peter 3:3-4, Peter exhorts us that "the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit is a great price in the sight of God." This is what modesty is – focusing on the inward rather than the outward. And once the Christian has developed inward beauty, his maturity and love for Christ will manifest itself on the outside.

We are exhorted by the Apostle Paul to reflect our holy living and our status as saints. Ephesians 4:1 says, "I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called." But what is the purpose of modesty? From the above, we see that modesty is an opportunity to develop inward beauty. And modesty is also a restraint. Romans 14:13b instructs us "…that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother’s way." A stumbling block is "any cause of stumbling; that which forms a difficulty in one’s way or which causes offence." And to say that immodesty is not a cause of stumbling is just wrong.

But while we must be careful of having any appearance of evil and take precaution against it by modest dressing, the Bible is not against beauty. The Bible is not against looking good. In fact, the Bible praises it. We know this because the Bible compliments women on their outward appearance – Rebekah, Rachel, and Esther were described to be very beautiful and lovely in form. The cultivation of beauty and appearance was celebrated and this is much evidenced by the cosmetics used, such as perfumes and henna for make up. But these things must be used and practiced in maturity – to understand the necessity for modesty, yet a comely exercise of maturity in the use of such apparel.

And furthermore, the Bible is not against the human body, and uses of it for romance. Some hardliners say that the woman’s breasts are only meant for the nourishment of her children, but the Bible doesn’t restrict it to that. In Proverbs 5:19, Solomon gave some advice to his son and said of the son’s wife, "Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love." But these pleasures are only to be enjoyed within the marriage covenant. Unfortunately, much of the clothing today are disagreeable to the principles of modesty and marriage. But if that were the case, should there not be rules and regulations as to what Christians should wear? Unfortunately, this is not an easy thing to implement, for it could lead to legalism. Besides, in this New Testament Age, we have liberty being captive to our conscience. Nevertheless, Christians can abuse their liberty, leading themselves to licentious (morally unrestrained) living. Hence, what is needed is Christian maturity and charity. But if there was indeed maturity and charity, I wouldn’t have to write this article!

It is precisely because of a lack of Christian maturity and charity that there needs to be a dressing-down. But it is with much trepidation that this is done – indeed, the lack of caution in this area of dressing may be caused by one of three different factors – ignorance, indifference, or insurgence. To those who are ignorant, I pray that the instruction given would be sufficient to evoke a quick spiritual response.

But unto those who are indifferent or insurgent, it is an indication of your maturity and charity. I don’t mean to be the church’s critic, but I do echo Charles Spurgeon’s sentiments when he says, "It is not for me to set myself up as universal censor of the church, but I must be honest and say, that spiritual life, and fire, and zeal, and piety, seem to be absent from the church in ten thousand instances." And I believe one of those instances is a lack of caution in our personal grooming. We are not as careful as we should be – we are not as willing to move towards maturity. When godly and mature Christians and leaders of the Church caution us in this area, we should listen. This builds maturity and charity. Spurgeon says, "As we grow in grace, we are sure to grow in charity, sympathy, and love. We shall, as we ripen in grace, have greater sweetness towards our fellow Christians." Did you think of others?

So please, cover up more – raise the standard by lowering the hemline of your skirts, reveal your maturity by hiding more flesh, and tighten the reins of worldliness in the church with looser clothing.

And to those of you who are more mature and godly, the job of admonition is yours too! Speak up! Counsel! Admonish! Good convictions on dressing don’t happen overnight. Imagine if more of you were to speak up! This dressing-down is for you too.